


Happy

by sansiva1203



Series: Zutara Week 2018 [1]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, First Kiss, Zutara Week, Zutara Week 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-29
Updated: 2018-07-29
Packaged: 2019-06-17 01:34:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15450450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sansiva1203/pseuds/sansiva1203
Summary: the gaang is at the royal palace for a celebration. neither katara nor zuko is happy, but maybe together, they can be. rated t for language.“you’re your own person, katara. i know you don’t need anyone telling you this, and you sure as hell don’t need me telling you this, but you don’t need to do anything simply because you think you’re expected to. have you seen me?”





	Happy

**Author's Note:**

> written for day 1 of zutara week 2018, based on prompts on tumblr. set post zuko’s crowning as fire lord, canon compliant with a:tla, divergent from korra, third-person omniscient, rated t for language. unbetaed, but i am looking for someone to read my future zutara, so please hit me up in the comments for either any of my grammar mistakes or to be my beta.

zuko knows a life without happiness. he knows a life without joy. he knows a life without enjoying the simple things or appreciating the pleasures in life you already have, or what unconditional love feels like. for the better part of his childhood and teenage years, zuko led life blinded by the nearly unreachable goal of capturing the avatar and subsequently regaining his honor.

zuko took the first step towards mending his broken outlook on life when he became lee. lee led a quasi-normal life, and serving tea, despite its tediousness, was not the worst thing that zuko had ever done, especially after meeting jin. after a long, long time, zuko begins healing his broken, bashed, and abused heart. he makes up with his uncle. he joins the gaang, albeit with some difficulty at first, but all that is overcome in due time. aang beats fire lord ozai (zuko refuses to acknowledge the name “phoenix king”), zuko and katara defeat azula, and toph, sokka, and suki kick some fire nation ass. 

merely a few days after team avatar conquers the fire nation, prince zuko is coronated, taking the place of azula, who sat both in a prison cell and in zuko’s subconscious; his dreams, or rather nightmares, frequented by his heartless father and delusional sister. he has aang to stand beside him though, and mai to go home to. after everything they experienced together, katara is his best friend, his closest confidante. for the first time since his mother left, he thinks he is happy. really, truly, happy.

he is wrong.

****

aang tries hard. he really does. he tries to make it work with katara. but they weren’t right for each other. he expects katara to be the same girl she was during their travels; a doting, compassionate mother-like figure who would spend her days taking care of her husband and children. katara, on the other hand, had aspirations for the future that transpired well beyond being a housewife. their relationship was doomed from the start when aang kisses her without permission. but by now, both of them are too scared to leave the comfort of a relationship they know. charted territory was always the easy way out.

****

katara, aang, and the rest of their group of misfits are staying in the royal palace for a short while to celebrate the five-year-anniversary marking the end of the war and zuko’s coronation. during this time, katara cracks open the door to zuko’s study, where he spends most of his day, and too much time in the night, mai used to think. katara sees zuko, her best friend, hunched over a desk littered with scrolls and ink. he has giant purple semicircles that seem to be permanently affixed under his eyes, so dark they look bruised. she notices a minute tremble in his left hand resting on the table, undoubtedly caused by the stress that he puts on himself to restore the honor of the fire nation. at the sight of a disheveled zuko, katara loses what composure she had left and breaks into tears, taking the few steps needed to collapse into zuko’s arms. he immediately drops whatever he was doing at the moment and wraps himself around katara. their position is a little awkward, with him seated in his chair and katara on her knees, supported only by zuko’s strong arms, but they spend what seems like an eternity in each other’s embrace. zuko rubs his hand over katara’s back soothingly, not knowing exactly what the issue was but being there for her all the same, knowing that he’s wanted someone to do the same on uncountable occasions. katara sobs relentlessly into the crook of zuko’s neck, breathing in his distinct scent of sandalwood soap. she eventually calms enough to be heaving giant breaths with small hiccups instead of uncontrollable tears.

it only takes a few more moments for katara to reduce her breaths to a few quiet sniffles, and she pulls away from zuko’s hold, wiping away at her eyes. avoiding eye contact, katara glances anywhere except the gold windows to the soul of her first crush. she notices that zuko’s semi-elegant robe is tear-stained all the way down from the neckline to the right side and sleeve.

“i’ll get that,” she mumbles quietly, and with a controlled flick of the wrist and fingers, katara wicks the salty water out of zuko’s and her own clothing, and evaporates it with another masterful movement. zuko reaches out a hand and gently knocks it against the bottom of katara’s chin, not forcing, but suggesting that she meets his eyes. she complies.

“you never cease to amaze me, you know that?” katara sharply inhales at the sound of his low, husky, and slightly hoarse voice. much more masculine than what aang or sokka sound like, she thinks. katara nods microscopically and zuko almost unconsciously pulls her back into his shoulder. this time, though, instead of prompting katara to let it all out, he reassures her, whispering sweet nothings into her ear, still holding her firmly in his solidly built figure, but with enough restrain that she could pull away if she wanted to. he tells her how strong she is, how brave she is, and makes sure to add proof, as zuko is well aware of the way katara pulls apart arguments, being on the receiving end of that more than a few times. several minutes later, when zuko has all but confirmed that katara has fallen asleep on him, he thinks about mai.

****

it’s no secret that zuko had a little bit of a crush on katara during their traveling days. of course, ponytail zuko had thought she was water tribe scum, but sexy-hair zuko found himself falling for her time and again, and not just because of the fact that she was beautiful; in fact, he hadn’t even noticed her beauty first. no, he knew about her stubborn qualities long before the desire set in. of course, in the post-war anxiety, he knew he had to do something right by his nation as one of his first public decisions, and mai had a great reputation with the people. so, zuko pushed his teenage crush to the back of his mind and began his new adult chapter of life with mai.

however many times the fire sages and zuko’s council pushed for a betrothal, zuko steadfastly refused with a variety of excuses. “we’re only teenagers!” was combined with “a royal wedding would be very expensive while rebuilding most of the world,” and “we should give the country time to settle after the shock” was occasionally thrown into the mix.

the council was suspicious; how could they not be? but zuko inherently knew his hesitance with getting married had nothing to do with the political and economic state of the fire nation; rather, he knew that he and mai were not a good match. sure, she was well-liked by the people, and they had known each other nearly all of their lives, but they just didn’t click, at least, not in the manner in which zuko expected them to. zuko couldn’t be himself around her and he didn’t think he could handle a lifetime of treading lightly and always being on guard. yet, he found himself constantly changing himself for mai, like he just couldn’t bear to be all alone in the world again if they broke up. he had dealt with not having someone to hold or holding him when life was just a little bit too rough for long enough.

as the day marking the end of zuko’s fifth year in rule of the fire nation approached, he became more and more unhappy with his life. he was a teenager and in control of the most powerful country in the world, but looking back, that had nothing to do with his general displease with his life. after he realized that it was his relationship the caused his constant gloomy disposition, he finally mustered up the bravery to talk to mai, really talk to her, for the first time in years.

all in all, he thought it went quite well.

of course, that could be zuko’s diluted but present machismo talking, but in the end, neither party was particularly upset or hurt. they both knew there would be no vengeful exes coming after them in the near future.

****

back in the present, katara stirs gently in zuko’s hold, and blinks open her blue eyes to stare into his wide, browns ones. with a gentle and loving smile, zuko awkwardly gestures to the ornate sofa a couple of feet away. she nods and the two of them move to the couch, still attached at the hip. 

once sitting comfortably and facing zuko head on, katara begins to speak.

“you know, aang and i technically would’ve celebrated our five-year anniversary today,” she trails off. the thought had never occured to zuko.

“the thought,” he says, “has never occured to me. is that what brought this on?”

katara nods. “he wanted to get married. the monks, of course, never married, but the air nomads that did were generally settled down by sixteen.

“i don’t know if i’m ready for that,” katara admits. “i mean, i’m nineteen years old! in the southern water tribe, my dad would have never even allowed me to date by now! and he wants to get married. married!”

katara abruptly cuts herself off and glanced down at her hands fiddling with the hem of her pants on her crossed legs. she looks up from her lap and promptly explodes.

“i don’t even know if i wanna be with him! i mean, we only got together because he kissed me! in front of everyone! without my permission! after i said i was confused! and i didn’t know what i wanted! like what!” katara was full on freaking out now. she realized her mania and took a deep breath. zuko still hasn’t said anything yet. katara appreciates this; the fact that he was letting her work out her own feelings before inserting his own thoughts and emotions into the conversation. again, this was one thing aang would never do.

but this time, she wants to hear what zuko has to say. he’s one of her best friends, one of the only people in the world who has ever really understood her, and this is something that katara knows she can’t handle by herself.

“so?” she asks, a little nervous. what would he say? “what do you think?”

zuko stares at her for a moment.

“you’re your own person, katara,” he finally blurts out, just a little bit confused. where did the confident, independent girl who didn’t take anyone’s shit go?

“i know you don’t need anyone telling you this, and you sure as hell don’t need  _ me _ telling you this, but you don’t need to do anything simply because you think you’re expected to. have you seen me?” zuko gestures to his own self.

“i’m a fuck-up,” he says sadly. “i’m a fuck-up whose father never loved him, whose mother left him, and whose sister tried to kill him. yet did i listen to them? at first, yeah, but that was a shitty move.

“i’m still a fuck-up,” zuko continues, a small smile dangling off his lips. “but now i have people to be there for me. and i will never once do something i don’t want to because someone else says i should.” the other meaning of his words hit zuko straight in the face as he realizes what could’ve happened to katara.

zuko immediately reaches forward and puts his hands on both of katara’s shoulders, shaking her back and forth gently but rapidly.

“katara, has he done anything to you? anything you didn’t want to? did he hurt you? did he hurt you!” zuko is the one panicking now. if aang had so much as touched a hair on her head, he was about to be in for a real pounding, no matter if he was the avatar and zuko was the fire lord.

katara immediately backtracks. “tui and la, no, nothing like that, ever. i can’t even imagine that happening!”

zuko lets out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, immensely relieved that he doesn’t have to beat up a seventeen-year-old kid for hurting his best friend.

with a quiet “oh, thank agni,” zuko lets go of katara, but scooches forward just a touch. taking a gambit, zuko takes katara’s hands in his and slowly rubs his thumb along the inside of her wrist, noticing the visible shiver that ran through her body.

he takes a second to think about what katara had said when another epiphany took place. 

“did you…” zuko didn’t know if he wanted to ask this question. “did you say ‘would’ve had our five-year-anniversary’? as in, you’re not anymore?” zuko was meeker than katara had ever seen him, and she nods, ashamed.

“i told him that i wanted a break to figure out things on my own. you know, without his ever-present accompaniment. i guess it’s for the best.”

zuko treaded carefully. for the first time in five years, katara was available again. not that he was about to snatch her up into the clutches of yet another powerful man, but still. even the fact that this was the first thought that ran through his mind after katara said she was single embarrassed zuko, but hey, even though he was the fire lord, he was a twenty-one year old guy first.

in all this time, katara was beginning to get scared. she reached out and brushes her bent knuckles over zuko’s jawline. in an instant, with almost primal instincts, zuko’s hand shoots up on top of hers. a beat later, with an adorably perplexed look on his face, zuko loosens his grip on katara’s wrist, expecting her to pull away immediately. he knows that it was probably weird and creepy that he craved the physical touch she gave him, however innocent it might be.

she doesn’t, though. katara opens her loose fist and uses the pads of her fingertips, calloused from something or the other, to gently trace zuko’s prominent cheekbone. he stiffens, and waves of shivers run through his body. the things this girl does to him…

katara, noticing zuko’s evident discomfort, pulls away, red in the face and so embarrassed she stutters over her words. “tui and la, i’m so sorry zuko! i didn’t mean to do that, i mean, i did, but i didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable! i’ll just go now…”

katara is half off the sofa when zuko wraps his fingers around her slim wrist and pulls her back onto the couch. he leans forward, and pauses for a split second with his lips half a millimeter from katara’s. he feels her inhale sharply against his lips, the feeling exhilarating and thrilling at the same time. zuko tilts his head to the right, places a hand on the curve of her jaw, and leans in.

the moment that zuko and katara’s lips touch is the same moment that he winds his fingers into her hair and she puts both palms onto his chest. his tongue is already gently in her mouth, darting against hers and tracing her bottom lip. before their kiss can get any further than chaste, though, zuko pulls away and runs a hand through his hair, brushing the shoulder length locks of dark, curly hair out of his face. before he can say anything, katara reaches out once again and traces the bottom edge of zuko’s scar.

“you’re so beautiful,” she says, breaking a gender norm. placing her other hand on zuko’s other cheek, she grasps his faces gently and pulls it closer it meet hers. this time, zuko is the one who’s shocked. katara takes power, slowly bringing a knee over zuko’s lap to slightly straddle him, and twists her long, thin fingers into his unruly hair. zuko tentatively brings up a hand to rest on katara’s shoulder and hovers the other over her hip bone. katara scoffs internally, laughing at zuko’s hesitance, and pulls a hand out of his hair to press his hand to her waistline.

it’s a long while before zuko and katara break apart again; they aren’t amateurs who need such worldly things like air. their hands have both wandered well beyond innocent places and both benders are breathing heavily. 

suddenly, katara stands up, straightens out her clothing, and says “well, i’ll see you tomorrow, zuko. sleep well!” and walks straight out his study,

zuko gapes at the empty space in front of him like he’s just been slapped, shakes head violently sending his hair flying, and stares again. he sadly looks down again, a little confused, and then mutters decidedly to himself. 

“women,” he says, and then walks up and crosses the room back to his desk. picking up one of the open scrolls on his table, zuko sits down with a plop on his chair and begins to read once again.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading! every view, kudos, and comment truly makes my day and means so much for me, so if you think the fic is deserving, leave kudos and comments please!
> 
> come yell at me on tumblr: find me at veridian-nougat


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